I struggle on in effort’s submission
Can’t control the lust for peace
Stay up late, searching for something
Quiet in abnormal treatise
Much is lost in drawn-out speech
Longer than needed, words for lease.
It’s laughter that brings me round again
Too loud to squash in greed
Hard and cold, this forgotten road
To leave behind, I must enfold,
Restrain the beast that still haunts me.
My youth drifts away with every beat
Will cracks in pitiful strain
Must my soul be torn to ribbons,
Break to splinters in struggle vain?
To have this knowledge is a curse
Pieces of lost hope fall like rain.
And now in the darkest of unlit nights
Brutal creatures awaken in glee
Honesty- hated! jumps up, prevails
Pervade the last humble hope left to me.
–
Thoughts of regret and my selfish demise
Wander through cliffs, steep in pride long begat
Constantly searching for ways to recall
Back to the memories so quickly forgot.
Return to the prison prepared long ago
To stay, locked in a cell I maintain-
Keep, for the rest of my natural-born life
Insane from the ravings of an ambitious brain.
I sit alone in the corner and ponder;
Love what I hate to have become
You stand in the silence, unseen and unheard
More than a word, you speak to me, more
Than a sound, my heart readily gulps
I drink in sweet province, grace rushes down
Should I open my eyes, I’d come undone.
And with a simple offering, cleared
Yet softer comes my guilty soul
God clears that too! and with His Love
Smiles as I gaze above through clouds,
Through stars, towards my new goal.
My faith assured. My sins, no more. My
Pain, long gone. By grace, restored.
–
Reach down, my King, and save this man!
My journey long and dangerous: yes.
Hand and foot, fear and joy
Out with the old way of doing things.
For in this heart you’ll see a change
Your work revealed by toil and rest
Grasp for peace only Your grace brings.
To walk this path, I’m not alone. Still
Keep my focus straight and true
In lust I’ll turn towards sin. Keep this
Heart on righteous ways, renew
And feed the flame desiring your
Name, to make this soul a living fire for you.
Your guidance in the years to come
Love, sent to me for mercy’s sake.
Your peace, through centuries, calms the storm
Life sends towards shores of endless breaks.
Your trials- mere tests- of courage and heart
Trust your presence shining, imparts
In whose tears runs immortal quarts
Me, a sinner, do so emboldened take.
To see your face a final time, Lord!
Guide me towards Heaven’s shining gate!
You stand in splendor, wreathed in light
On every tower, angels sway
In this, I find, a home at last
Glory’s city has no better
Way, than this- A road with You.
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