Okay, so being happy doesn’t give me the right to not post for a week. I should have specified. I am a lazy butthole.<\/p>\n

While I’m in a self-deprecating mood, let me tell you why it’s annoying to hear me talk. <\/p>\n

Here’s a short story: today, someone asked me what my thoughts were on the upcoming election, and instead of shaking my head and saying something like “That’s a bad idea” or “We can just start punching each other in the mouth right now if you want”, I began a 3-minute-long rant about why I was too high and mighty to vote this year. As I felt myself turning into a tool, the asker’s face told a story of immediate regret, so I wrapped up and apologized for ranting.<\/p>\n

Here are all the things I figure out today:<\/p>\n

\n
• I should always give someone at least two outs.<\/li>\n
• If anyone asks my opinion on the election, I should answer with a joke.<\/li>\n
• No one needs to hear a long explanation of anything unless it’s a political debate and I’m at some sort of podium, in which case I still should tell a joke and give them two outs.<\/li>\n
• I will never be Alexander Hamilton and I should stop trying.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

  On the plus side, several things were impressed upon me today. My wife is incredibly supportive, even when I’m annoying, and people still care about personal opinions. It’s a good thing that some folks are willing to approach an almost-assuredly-tempers-flaring subject with acquaintances and friends. Just, probably don’t ask me. I am not a smart man.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  Okay, so being happy doesn’t give me the right to not post for a week. I should have specified. I am a lazy butthole. While I’m in a self-deprecating mood, let me tell you why it’s annoying to hear me talk.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1675,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"You probably shouldn't ask me about the election. #2016 #crapshoot","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[908],"tags":[1600,1601,332,1602,1603,1604,663],"class_list":["post-1673","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-journal","tag-acquaintances","tag-election-2016","tag-friends","tag-joke","tag-political-view","tag-politics","tag-questions"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\n